With friendships come disagreements, and with these differences of opinions, you are bound at sometime or another to get involved in an argument that may lead to someone getting their feelings hurt. Of course, it’s best to avoid this altogether and you should know you can train yourself to recognize the signs and stop a heated argument before it starts.
We live in the real world and we know in life we are going to have disagreements that may end up in full-fledged verbal combat. There is never an excuse or reason to become physical with someone, especially a friend, no matter how strongly you disagree with someone. You also have to understand mere words are enough to cause everlasting harm to someone, even if you didn’t really mean it. That’s probably why our parents taught us to think about what we are going to say before we say it!
If your friendship has taken a big hit after a verbal spat, here’s how to apologize to a friend and begin to mend your relationship:
1. Text your friend a message or send a letter letting him or her know you are sorry for what happened. You are not admitting fault by doing this; you are merely pointing out the fact that the whole situation has caused you plenty of grief and you don’t want to ruin the friendship. Even if you were right during the argument, who cares? Your friendship is much more important than proving a point. An apology letter to a friend is extremely effective because it’s so personal and the person who receives it knows how much work goes into writing one and mailing it.
2. If you know you were wrong, admit it. Too often, our pride gets in the way of building and maintaining lasting and meaningful relationships. So what if you made a huge mistake! By the same token, if you feel you were not wrong, now is not the time to shove it in your friend’s face. With that said, you should not feel obligated to admit you were wrong unless you genuinely realize you are the one who was in error. Change the subject instead and talk about something else. You have plenty of time to laugh someday about how ridiculous you both acted over something so silly.
3. Introduce a peace offering. Invite your friend to a nice lunch or dinner. This gesture clearly says to the person,”Hey, I’m still here for you through thick and thin” without making it appear that you are sucking up.
4. Give your friend some space. Sometimes, a friend may ignore all of your text messages or phone calls for a while. Don’t let this make you become frustrated or angry; your friend is dealing with it the best way he or she knows how regardless of whether you think it’s right or wrong.
5. When the moment is right, give your friend a hearty hug. So, you guys have talked it through and maybe have come to somewhat of an understanding. You’ve paid the tab at your lunch get-together and now it’s time to seal the friendship. For men, there’s nothing wrong with the firm handshake and a shoulder bump that says, “Dude, I still love you” without even having to say those words of you don’t want to. For women, a full upper torso body hug with a sincere, “I love you” is appropriate.
Great! Now you guys could go back to calling each other all those silly and
funny names as if nothing ever happened. The wonderful thing about your whole ordeal is you can turn your disagreement into an experience that brings you closer together in a friendship.