With so many “get your ex back” digital products out there, it’s difficult to figure out which way to turn when you really do want to get your hands on some solid information to help you reconnect with your “honey” or “baby” and make everything alright! One book says this and the other says that when, in the end, how you approach getting your ex back depends on four things;  acquiring good information, devising a plan based on that info, playing it smart, and being patient!

You can’t force a person to want to be with you, much less to love you again. It needs to happen naturally. Many people have reported having much success in reconciling with their exes after learning techniques on how to do it through careful research and by relying on helpful courses through the Internet. The Web has a wealth of free information people will find very useful but it’s difficult to piece the bits of information together to make it work ideally.

Without a doubt, the best way to approach getting an ex back is to find a guide you are comfortable with and put the step by step techniques into action. There are many to choose from and some of these courses teach a novel approach that gets results, evidenced not by the sales pages (these can be manipulated easily), but by the response you read about in forums.

With that said, when it comes to finding ways to get your ex back, the most logical place to start is to know what works and what doesn’t work. Here is a comprehensive list of the 20 most common mistakes people make when they are trying to get their “sweetie” back as well as the right strategies to get your ex back:

1. Appearing needy and begging them to stay. The last thing you want is your ex feeling sorry for you as go down to your knees and beg him or her to stay. It would be absolutely pathetic and uncomfortable for most people to have to endure this and it’s highly likely you will have ruined your chance to get back together. Instead, give your ex some space, acknowledge that it hurts, but don’t give the impression that your world is destroyed because of their departure. Appearing strong is one of the most important ingredients to make your ex get back with you.

2. Calling your ex incessantly. Nobody likes beingA break up can wreak havoc on your emotions but you have to stay strong and move forward. bothered or suffocated and that’s what you are doing if you don’t leave your ex alone for a while. You will have plenty of time later to reconnect and it’s best to let go at this point in time, at least for a while.The best approach is to call after two weeks and send a sweet text message that reads, “I saw (something  or someone) today and it reminded me of you. Just wishing you the best and hoping you’re OK.” A message like this indicates your ex still crosses your mind and that you still care. If your ex does not respond, don’t send another message. Let them make the next move and go from there while keeping in mind that you don’t want to come off as a needy or desperate person.

3. Harassing friends and family members about getting your ex back. Refrain from asking about how your ex is doing, whom she or he is going out with, how your ex feels, etc. Do not fish for information because those same people will let their loose lips fly, the information will get back to your ex, and you will appear as needy as a person who hasn’t eaten for days! You will be back to square one with no chance in the world to get your ex back.

4. Saying you are going to change or you would do anything to get back together. C’mon, where in the world did your self-respect go? You can’t wheel and deal your way back into somebody’s heart! Furthermore, how many times haven’t you heard of someone who has stated they will change, only to do the same thing over and over again. Do you think your ex is going to believe you? Again, you will sound like a beggar if you go this route so leave it alone! A much better route to take here is to show, and not tell, and the only way to accomplish this is through your actions over time.

5. Stalking your ex. Is your ex getting the feeling you are in the same club or bar they are going because you are following them? Are you posting or directing messages to your ex on Twitter and Facebook which make references to your broken relationship? Get real! The worst that can happen is you can get arrested and charged with cyber stalking for causing substantial emotional distress as a result of your messages. Leave you ex alone and stop trying to be sneaky about it because you will not only destroy your chances of getting him or her back, you stand a chance of getting seriously burned.

6. Making your ex feel guilty. This is no time to blame anyone. Doing so will only cause further resentment and you will appear very desperate. Oftentimes, this approach causes the other person to justify why they broke up in the first place and they are happy they made the right decision! Take responsibility for whatever happened by offering no excuses.

7. Panicking and saying things you wish you could take back. When people get hurt, they sometimes say things they don’t really mean while trying to express their emotions. Don’t fall into this trap and get a hold of yourself. You may end up appearing needy and desperate if you don’t have your head screwed on right. Relax and take a step back so you can assess the damage and save your evergy for your plan on how you are going to go about getting your ex back.

8. Maintaining your health and appearance. Many people “let themselves go” after a break-up because they want the other person to see how it is affecting them. This is the total opposite of what you should be doing; you don’t want anybody to pity you! This is a golden opportunity for you to start getting into the best shape you have ever been in; remember, physical attraction is a big part of a romantic relationship.

9. Continuing to be negative. Who in the world are you going to convince that the relationship will work if you never have anything good to say about your life or anything in general? Nobody likes to be around people who are miserable so you should focus on a solution instead of dwelling on the negative aspects of your broken relationship as well as your life.

10. Not appearing confident. You will probably run into your ex at some point in time and now is the time to get your confidence level back up to where it should be. Men and women are both equally attracted to confident people and you don’t want your ex to see you walking around town with your head down and a stick with a bag tied to the end of it while you are kicking empty beer cans!

11. Agreeing to be “just friends.” Never agree to this type of deal because, after all, this is an impossibility because you simply can’t see this person as just a friend if you are in love! This is oftentimes the beginning of the end because you will give the other person an easy way out of any possible future relationship, forever! Tell your ex you understand and respect how he or she feel but that you can’t be just friends, and you need to have a good explanation as to why.

12. Placing your ex on a pedestal. Your ex is not the only fish in the sea and you need to get that through your head. So don’t mope around wishing things could go back to the way they used to be because your ex is the most beautiful thing you ever had in your life. Love can make you blind, so open open up your eyes and see the rest of the world.

13. Drinking excessively or using drugs. The obvious problem with this is your health will suffer and your ex will probably feel pity for you upon hearing how you have taken a turn for the worse. Can anybody say, game over for any chance whatsoever of getting back? It’s OK to hang out with your friends and chug back a few but here are words of caution; the influence of alcohol or drugs can make you do things you don’t want to do such as calling your ex at three in the morning and hearing a person of the opposite sex pick up the phone. Ouch!

14. Putting your life on “hold.” Why would you want to stop living your life the way you know how? Is it going to change anything? Absolutely not. This is the time to resume your life and the great news is you will reconnect with your friends and probably breathe a sigh of relief while you figure out and devise a plan on getting your ex back.

15. Waiting far too long and not putting your plan into action. The worst thing you can do is not be prepared for when your ex calls you. You need to know what to do and what to say. You have to be living your life to the fullest while giving the impression that you have never been more happy with yourself. This is where having a great getting back with your ex guide will make a difference.

16. Not being realistic. You have to come to terms with the fact that there is a possibility that you may have to let go for a while or even forever. You can follow every step of the best plan on ways to get your ex back and it still may not work because the relationship simply was not going to survive in the first place. The sooner you accept this, the better off you will be and you will have a more attractive attitude when you do make contact with your ex.

17. Not being willing to change. Everyone can stand to improve themselves and it makes sense to, once again, show your ex that you can change without coming out and saying it. Your actions will speak volumes when you change your ways and it just might be the magical potion for getting back with an ex.

18. Not paying attention to what your ex wants. Your ex may hate something as simple as the way you drink excessively around her family or how rude you are to waiters when you dine. You should have respected him or her more than you did and now you have to pay the price. People can change and so can you. Make a list of the things you believe your ex hates about you and start working on them, pronto!

Learn how to get back with your ex and turn cold into heat.19.  Having too much pride. Your pride will get in the way of ever reconnecting with your ex if you let it. So what, if you have to admit you were wrong sometimes! Nobody can stand a person who thinks they are always right. If you don’t put a way that foolish pride you may end up sabotaging any real chance you had at getting back together with your ex and letting the chance of a lifetime slip right through your fingers.

20. Not using proper tips and techniques to get their ex back. Everyone needs help sometimes. This is the perfect time to rely on experts who can guide you to having the best chance to get your ex back. If you or a loved one were arrested and facing criminal charges, you would want an attorney to represent you. If you were planning your retirement and had a lot of money to invest, you would want the best financial adviser possible. The same goes with getting your ex back. You want an expert or experts that get results to give you the best opportunity possible. Use the information in this article and check out a few get your ex back guides; they just might be your ticket to finding happiness with your “baby” once again.